I think I have got myself into something I can’t get out of. I really didn’t think this would happen. I didn’t think I wouldn’t be able to control myself. I didn’t think what people said was true, I thought they just didn’t have enough will power. I thought I was better than them. I thought I knew how to handle myself.
Now i’m just chilling, alone, in my room almost all the time drinking by myself, lying to friends claiming i’m sick or not home, or tired just so I don’t have to socially interact with people. I use to only drink with friends. Now I don’t want to drink with people I just want to drink and smoke weed in my bedroom.
Then I have fucking Brandon and Kyle begging me to do angel dust with them.
No no no. My life is fucked as it is. I can’t get back into that. -__- I’m such a failure.